I've decided I want to keep a running list of the stupid and/or mean things I say when I know noone can hear me. For instance: on the way home this morning some stupid jackass in an older model SUV was putt-puttin' it along Hugeunot road. He had a bumper sticker on his car that said "I'm proud of my cub Scout." So because I was irritated and couldn't get around him, I said "I'm proud of you getting the fuck outta my way."
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Today...
I have books to read, rooms to clean, phone calls to make and yet I can't seem to drag myself up off the floor, away from my coffee and my laptop to get stuff started. Quinn is riding his tri-cycle around the house and the babysitter is milling around the house. It's just a lovely day to relax and so I just want to do that too.
Books to read: Janet Evanovich #18, Suzanne Collins Catching Fire.
Rooms to clean: The house
Calls to make: re: taxes
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Two Days
This past week I spent two whole days alone with my little guy. Then a third with the babysitter there too (I had to work that night.) I thought it would be really stressful. He is so high energy and gets into everything. He doesn't really listen very well, he makes an obviously conscious decison not to, so the inevitable frustration is there a lot.
So that's exactly how it went the first day. Me wanting an adult beverage, him running his fool head off, screaming and trying to drive me insane. But it was raining and we couldn't go anywhere, so it we were cooped up inside the house- that's no good for a 2 year old.
The second day was different. It was GREAT! We went to the grocery store and took lunch to Mark and then took long naps. It was really fun. We colored and ran around outside with the dog... there were things to do and energy to do them. So it ended up being really great.
I learned something too. First, my kid is BRILLIANT! I mean really really smart. Shockingly so. I know I'm biased. I don't care. He's so quick to pick things up. Second, that tiny little man is FUNNY! He's got a great sense of humor (was there ever a doubt??) and he's playful and interested. I know I knew these things prior to the last couple of days... but seeing them in action, seeing him learn and grow right before my eyes... well, I don't get that often. That's what being a working mom has left me with. The grumpy nights and quick hugs in the mornings. I haven't gotten to see his development. It saddens me. But it also makes me want to try harder to engage him. To be there for whatever I can be. Things are going to change. It's not in the cards financially, so I have to dig out what I can get and be ok with the rest.
Mostly, it was really nice to bond with him. I love that little boy more than anything else in this world and I got to feel him loving me back for the first time really. God Bless Him.
So that's exactly how it went the first day. Me wanting an adult beverage, him running his fool head off, screaming and trying to drive me insane. But it was raining and we couldn't go anywhere, so it we were cooped up inside the house- that's no good for a 2 year old.
The second day was different. It was GREAT! We went to the grocery store and took lunch to Mark and then took long naps. It was really fun. We colored and ran around outside with the dog... there were things to do and energy to do them. So it ended up being really great.
I learned something too. First, my kid is BRILLIANT! I mean really really smart. Shockingly so. I know I'm biased. I don't care. He's so quick to pick things up. Second, that tiny little man is FUNNY! He's got a great sense of humor (was there ever a doubt??) and he's playful and interested. I know I knew these things prior to the last couple of days... but seeing them in action, seeing him learn and grow right before my eyes... well, I don't get that often. That's what being a working mom has left me with. The grumpy nights and quick hugs in the mornings. I haven't gotten to see his development. It saddens me. But it also makes me want to try harder to engage him. To be there for whatever I can be. Things are going to change. It's not in the cards financially, so I have to dig out what I can get and be ok with the rest.
Mostly, it was really nice to bond with him. I love that little boy more than anything else in this world and I got to feel him loving me back for the first time really. God Bless Him.
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